I remember reading Kahlil Gibran’s ‘The Criminal’ for the first time. It was one of those ‘Aha’ moments.

I think it is convenient for us to forget how much we effect others (even strangers). And this whole western idea of autonomy really pulls people away from taking responsibility for the poor and hurting. It’s absurd.

Speaking of snow… considering it’s availability and how many of my friends were using it I’m not sure why I never tried it. I’ve been thinking about this since I wrote this post. I watched Dave and Tim do lines off my mom’s stove. Later on they’d occasionally smoke it… I know I got a few contact highs from that shit. Same with the crack. I can remember it being very sweet smelling… but there was never any question about my interest in the coke or the heroin of the rest of it. I was always polite, but I always said no. I think… maybe some of my never trying it came from their reluctance to ever share it.

More words are always better Bromac.

Hello Stranger. That’s a fantastic blog you’ve got there. “the better things get the more uncomfortable I feel about it” that’s one of the most common reasons people stop their recovery, either from addiction or mental illness. Living without suicidal thoughts or random depressions and manic’s are the things we’re least prepared for…

Hi Hannah, there is a certain amount of “sameness” in our recoveries. Because the effects of manic depression are quantifiable there are lessons we can learn from the people who have recovered before us, and I think the idea of a moving mood spectrum is one of them. Redefining what is and what is not normal is a major part of our coming to terms that manic depression is a disease, and then being willing and able to adjust our “normals” as we begin to feel the emotions we haven’t really been able to feel… appropriately. Like “The Stranger” wrote, as the bracket raises the less comfortable we get.

It’s kind of like the situation I’m in with diabetes… because my blood sugar was so high for so long I got used to the symptoms and learnt how to live within a new normal. Once the medications started dropping the blood sugar levels I started to have and recognize all of the symptoms of diabetes. Despite my body getting better I actually started to feel worse. Now, because I’ve lived with the new level of symptoms for a few months, I’m starting to feel better within my new normal.

Hi Exact Science… no, you’re right, at least there wasn’t that. This time.

Annyong haseyo Esther, it’s always good to see you here. Having a friend self-destructing like that is always very hard to be dealing with. She’s lucky to have you around to help out. Is she going to meetings now?

And I’m sorry to hear about your friend Tim. I have a friend who’s been doing everything from weed to PCP. She’s recovering now, but it was fucking scary watching her trek through cycles of addiction.

As for the eavesdropper – shitty break. On the plus side you didn’t send a text message saying you were spending the night with a friend as she is fragile at the moment to said friend and not to you girlfriend to explain why you are ignoring her calls.